Perfectionism is a trait that makes life an endless report card on accomplishments or achievements. A desire to do well when healthy, can be self-motivating and drive you to overcome adversity and achieve success. When unhealthy and becomes perfectionism, it can be a track to unhappiness.
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What makes extreme perfectionism so difficult is it can make us too focussed on avoiding failure, and feel that we only deserve others’ approval if we execute a flawless performance. This can lead to procrastination, low mood, anxiety or depression.
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Perfectionism is often a learned behaviour that was modelled for you or a coping strategy in response to a stressful environment.
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People with perfectionism believe that they’re valuable only because of what they achieve or what they do for other people and others can unintentionally reinforce it.
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Academic settings can bring out perfectionism in young people.
Causes:
Symptoms:
A desire to achieve is healthy. But an irrational desire to always be perfect can cause problems. You may be experiencing perfectionism if you:
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Feel like you fail at everything you try
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Procrastinate regularly — you might resist starting a task because you’re afraid that you’ll be unable to complete it perfectly
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Struggle to relax and share your thoughts and feelings
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Become very controlling in your personal and professional relationships
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Become obsessed with rules, lists, and work, or alternately, become extremely apathetic
To lessen perfectionism, it may help to:
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Set realistic, attainable goals
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Break up overwhelming tasks
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Focus on one activity or task at a time
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Acknowledge everyone makes mistakes
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Recognize that most mistakes present learning opportunities
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Confront fears of failure by remaining realistic about possible outcomes
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Enjoy the process as much as the final outcome.
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Source support around anxiety
How Can You Avoid Perfectionism:
Resources:
